Peepli [live]: Do visit

Take Jaane bhi do yaaron, Hero Hiralal, Phir bhi dil hai hindustani and make the setting rural. Take some of the fine 'actors' (not stars) and give them characters (not roles). Take compelling Social issues and put a dose of humour. You get Peepli [live]. The movie humor but its own tongue in cheek style. For me, the best part was the performances , fantastic dialogues and absolutely precise casting. Music by Indian Ocean rocks. Direction is tight. It has everything but lacks that 'something' which shakes your soul when you have such a serious issue at a film's base. But still is one of the better movies this year. Do not miss.

The movie is about two brothers-one of which convinces the other to commit suicide so that they can get some money from the government, TRP hungry media, Don't care a damn Bureaucrats, Will do anything to stay or come in power Politicians. Apart from the main farmer suicide issue, the movie dealt more with the migration of workers to cities than villages because there is no option left for them, in a very subtle way.

The Best part about the movie was perfect casting. Everybody (and i mean everybody) scores. Be it the confused Natha, The Schemey Budhia, The venomous Mother, The irritated Bahu, The Politicians (local and national), The Reporters. Everyone suits one's role as if he/she was cast first and then the role was written after keeping him/her in mind. While watching you hardly seem to notice actors, but characters. I bet if you open your eyes and roll down car's windows tomorrow, you will watch all these characters on the street. And that obviously lead to one of the finest (collective) performances i have seen in a while.

The dialogues were pointed, satirical, entertaining and pinching at the same time. I have seen and heard budhia and Nathas in my locality as the press wallahs, the doodh wallahs, the maids in my childhood and you can take my word for it, that the words were absolutely the same. They are not the dialogues written by an urban 'scriptwriter' to be spoken by 'actors' but you can feel that earthy feel with every word uttered. Music again is typical Indian Ocean and (obviously) has that folk-y feel. The cinematography is neat (I really liked the scenes where actual media-cameras were used in the media-crowd scenes).

No doubt its an honest movie made from the heart, but it loses its steam in the middle when things start to get repetitive especially when the media spoofs become too spoofy. They are entertaining, no doubt, but I think the point was already made and it seems that it was stretched too far and wasn't required. Another thing that i felt could have been done was to actually stop the 'fun/humour' element at some point and the movie could have been given a 'darker' feel in the second half. With the subject like this, I think it would have been amazing if the movie could just spin over its head and suddenly turn negative and brutal.

According to me, Alls well that ends well applies most to movies. Most people take the last few sequences out of the cinema hall. Thats what they remember. It (any movie) could be a fantastic movie , but if the ending sucks. You suddenly ignore the better parts (just an example, not that it applies in this case) and come home only with the worse ones.

I would have really liked a 'Play-like' Ending, when the lead actor is lonely and sitting in the corner with a spotlight on, and it fades slowly. But in order to reach that build up, more brutality was required. You should feel for Natha, even cry for his state. He has the whole family back home. Wife, Mother, Brother, Kids but Here he is in the city, absolutely lonely. No one to talk to. He cant even go back. He cant even talk to them and still you don't feel as sad for him as you should have. Make the second half absolutely darker i say. For eg, what Dibarkar Banerjee did in LSD (the Love Story Chapter) when you have this spoofy feel throughout and suddenly the pair is killed brutally. THAT kind of a treatment towards the end could have taken the movie at a different level altogether. It could have made the audience 'feel' more for Natha.

Overall, one of the better movies this year. A Definite Watch

Feel-O-Meter: 7/10

PS: I think there were a lot of hidden messages in the script which i missed. Would definitely want to watch it again to understand it even better. For eg. Why was Natha riding a wedding horse while asleep? or What does the handpump signify? Do tell me if you have any idea.

The Expendables: Dispensable

The Expendables is a perfect example of how you can take up the biggest action stars like Stallone, Statham, Jet Li, Mickey Rourke, (cameos by) Arnie and Bruce Willis and two (almost) hotties and still make like the worst movie possible. Its exactly what its meant to be. The 80s action movie. The problem is we aren't in the 80s anymore, where idea of an action movie was blood splattered all across, gory throat slits, 1:236 Hero:Men Killed ratio, Mindless Explosions etc etc. Offers absolutely nothing except.... okay.. nothing. Even the A-Team was better.

Dear Sly, We have loved you so much in Rocky and Rambo series, butthat doesn't mean that we can love you over 60 doing actionsequenceslike a 20 something and romancing a 28 year old hottie, justbecauseyou are the producer (and the director). I mean for God's sake,she looks (and is more than) half your age. It was just gross to eventhink of, to be honest. Please Act your age.

The main plot is like any other TOLLYWOOD movie, that puts even Rajnikant to shame. Guys go on amission. One Guy falls in love with a girl there, who is left behind.The guy goes back with his other friends to rescue her. Villains,Villains' Chamchas, Hamming, Fire, People falling here and there,Blood, Blasts, Throats Slits, Hand Slits etc etc and the girl isrescued. The only difference being that the girl is (probably) lessthan the hero's daughters age. Its like Dharmendra teaming up withAmitabh Bachhan, Sunil Dutt, Shashi Kapoor, Shammi Kapoor, Pran etc torescue the love of his life (hmmm say Priyanka Chopra) from evil Ajitand (my favorite) Ranjeet. Even Priyanks is running full speed whenAjit is trying to take her away from Dharmendra.No wonder to be honest. If there is a choice between Stallone and the villain, any girl would choose the latter.

Most probably you would expect a mindless action movie, but the problem is that the action is also very 80s. There is nothing that impresses apart from a shot gun that blows (yes literally.. blows) you in half. The special effects are so bad, as if it was a animation project of an Arena Multimedia 2 month summer course's student. There is cacophony all over and you dont even seem to realize who is killing whom or who is blowing whose face/ body/helicopter/plane/drums/palace etc etc. Even the fights are so WWE kinds that they turn you off completely. I mean its full of those fake WWE locks and clotheslines and pearl drivers. I mean its ok that you have Steve Austin as a side villain but that doesn't mean you will choreograph the fights also like WWE.

Overall, the plot is pathetic, the action sequences are badly executed, funny lines are (except one or two) not funny, No chemistry between the lead pair or even the gang. There is absolutely nothing in the movie you might enjoy to be honest. Even Gisele Tittie ooooops... i mean Itie also stops being interesting after 10 minutes of screen time. Do not watch, even if you are paid to.

Feel-O-Meter :2/10

Star Wars: THE original epic

What makes Star Wars tick? There are so many movies and movie series, then what is in the george lucas' epic saga of the galaxy far far away that makes it different from all others and makes it what the others aren't. Afterall, there are series which have (arguably) made more money, have had better technology/special effects, had better story, had better characterization, had better performances, better heroes, better villains. If you are a performance oriented movies lover then Godfather scores. If you are the techie then LOTR and the Matrix. If you are the adventure kinds then the bonds and the bournes are there. If you are the fighter then the rambos and rockys are always there. Then What makes Star Wars so special?

Well, my take is that simply because it had All of the above and much more. The foremost thiing that i can think of is the story. Every movie (in its basic form) has this Good vs Evil story to begin with and then it moves further. Star Wars was no different. But to me, the humanness of the story is the biggest reason. More than anything else. The viewer just immerses in the story as if he is actually a part of the same. When in Empire Strikes back, Darth tells Luke, I am your father. You suddenly forget its a story and your heart just goes Ohhhh.. Now what!!! What would happen now. What would Luke do. Even in Return of the Jedi, when Luke confronts Darth Vader in the end, although you know that in the end Darth would turn good in the end, you still have your heart in your mouth, when those lightsabers collide. It is THEN, the movie stops being a technological show and you feel that a story is being told and the galaxy, the warships, the special effects or anything else is just ancillary to the basic plot of good vs evil and the human relationships in between.

The way Star Wars (although being a techie/special effects movie as far as the setting is concerned) deals with human relationships at the very basic level is portrayed in the most beautiful way possible. The Conflict between Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker as father-son is just the best portrayal that you could imagine. The father who once was a good man but now iis the warlord who is trying to kill the son and his friends (etc etc), but the son still feels that he has some good left in him.

On the relationships front only, there are these different friendships which bind the whole cast together. Starting from the phantom menace(i will go in the chronolical order of the story and not the release), we see that between obi wan and qui gon. Qui Gon and (young) Skywalker also have a similar friendship/chemistry despite their age gap. Even if you move further the friendship remains the essence of the series. Then between grown up Anakin and Obi Wan in the attack of the clones and Revenge of the Sith. Although Qui-Gon & Obi wan as well as Anakin and Obi Wan have this master disciple relationship, their friendship is still the more basic feeling that they feel for each other. Or for that matter, take Han Solo and Luke Skywalker, Han and Chewbaca or even (rather especially) R2D2 and C3PO. Despite them being robots, you can still feel that trust, care and friendship between the two. As if they are infact more human than the rest of the cast.

On the technology front also, i hear that LOTR was better or Matrix etc. But one thing we fail to realize is that when the first star wars was released. The wachowsky brotherw were yet to enter their teens. There was no internet. There were no movies(that i can remember) which had any special effects to talk about. First, the conceiving a story which was based on something hardly ever heard of and then thinking of ways to portray that onto the big screen was something. That too when most of us(who think that we have the authority to write anything on cinema :P ) were not even born. That was a feat in itself.

I dont quite know how much more i can go on and on and on, on each aspect of the movie. Infact i could just go on writing a note on each of the characters. On (arguably) the greatest movie villain of all times. On the adventure. On the Excitement. On the Chemistry. And a thousand other things. May be i am just an awestruck fan who thinks that the movie deals what cinema is supposed to do. Take you out of your daily miseries and tell you a story. A Story that will bind you down. A Story that stays with you even after you walk out of the cinema. A Story you would like to hear again and again no matter how many times you have heard it already. A Story that will take you to a wonderland where you have never been earlier. A story that lets you experience something you have never experienced earlier. Thats what Star Wars was. A Story that did all that. More than 3 Decades ago, still has the same effect even now and hopefully, will have the same effect on the generations to come. May the Force be with you. :)

Aisha: Sucks :P

Aisha is Jane Austen's Emma Adaptation, which has almost nothing to offer except two (may be three) good songs, three or four funny dialogues at the interval of around 30 minutes each, pretty good performance by the debutant amrita puri. Thats it. Its a perfect example of how badly you can screw up with an amazing subject because the film is produced by the lead actor's father. Make it 20 mins shorter. Throw out Sonam Kapoor and still can be watchable. I hope somebody else makes it coz i really liked the story. Don't watch.

The biggest problem with the movie was sonam kapoor. I mean for god's sake. SHE CAN'T ACT. Just because your father is an actor does not mean you have the ability to carry off a movie on your (almost anorexic) shoulders. The funnily squeaky voice doesn't help either. Its irritating to say the least. Every time she is on screen, I was like damn man, isn't there a fast forward option here. The worst part is that SHE is all what the movie has. Every single scene, frame, she is there. There is no scene that i can remember where she wasnt present and that screwed the matters even worse.

I understand that the movie is called 'Aisha' and she is supposed to be there but i wonder if Anil Kapoor hadn't produced it, same would have been the case. It looks like another 'Karate Kid-2010' where will smith made the movie just as a birthday (or whatever) present to his son. Anil has done the same may be. Sonam: "booo hoo hoooo, Daddy i am not getting any movies". Daddy: "'Ohhhhh, my poor baby, you want a gift. Okay let me produce a movie for you. You will play the lead. No one else will have anything else to do. And out of your 469 scenes may be somebody might notice ONE scene and you get another movie" types. Gimme a break..

To be honest, I think rest all were fine. Amrita puri has delivered a cracker of a performance. She is sweet, cute, stupid, bubbly and much more. She is the thing to watch out for. Ira Dubey din't have much to do and she doesn't hurt the eye. Abhay Deol has not been given any space to perform. He comes, says a dialogue or too. Goes away. Comes back again and has been given the most stupid lines. Lisa Haydon and Arunoday Singh do what they are supposed to. They look hotttt. Period. Cyrus Sahukar is funny here and there. Anand Tiwari is decent and thats it. Its Amrita puri all the way as far as performance is concerned.

The story (although borrowed) is pretty cool and deserved a much better female lead to carry it off. I wonder if a Preity Zinta could have done what Sonam couldn't. Athough there are 4 lead pairs and A loves B, B loves C, C loves A, D loves B, E loves A, F loves E and blah blah blah. You stilll realize (in the first 30 mins only) that who would land up with whom. The loser lands up with the loser. The hottie with the Hottie. The middle class with middle class. Childhood friend with Child hood friend. and in such a scenario only the situations and timing could have saved the cause. Sadly, it doesn't.

There were two or three very funny dialogues but almost come at an interval of 30 minutes each and till that time you are bored as hell. Some of the lines specially towards the end are amazingly stupid and not funny. You are like, WTF man...Who says that.. types..

Rajshree Ojha tries her best to save the movie from Sonam Kapoor and dheeli script and i am sure given a better actor and script, she would deliver a much better movie. Amit Trivedi has done his magic again in the title track, gall mithi mithi bol and Shaam. Background score is pretty so so. Nothing Dev D like.

Overall : A Pretty promising subject screwed due to a bad script and pathetic performance by the lead actor. Remove Sonam and make a tighter script and remove all the loser-ish dialogues in the second half and could be watchable then. Give it a miss otherwise.

Feel-O-Meter : 3/10

PS: I think the title role should have been given to Amrita Puri and she could have taken the movie to a different level altogether. and yeah, iif you like sonam kapoor (which is unlikely) and can tolerate her funny voice, you can watch it once i guess. :)

PPS: Even in the image, Abhay's Expression is like 'Like seriously??? and you call yourself an Actor??? :P

PPPS: The title of the note is borrowed from a friend's status msg :)

Once Upon a time in Mumbai: Salim Javed ruled bollywood

The movie more than being set in the 70s, is actually made like a 70s movie. Every frame reminds you of Manmohan Desai, Prakash Mehra, Yash Chopra, Ramesh Sippy, Salim Javed, Amitabh Bachan, Deewar, Don, Shaan, Trishul, Sholay, Zanjeer, even Agneepath (though late 80s). It reminds so much of those dialogue heavy film making when the movies were not about the story but the dialogues. Most 70s movies you can relate to, will have atleast one dialogue you will remember. From 'Mere paas Maa hai' to 'Main aaj bhi faike huye paise nahi uthata'. From 'Tera kya hoga kaliya' to 'Vijay Dinanath Chauhan'. Once upon is exactly in the same league. It does not overdo it like Farah Khan to show that she loves the bollywood of that era. Rather it takes the same setting and makes the movie exactly as per the narrative. Stunning performances, Kick Ass dialogues, Decent Music, Controlled direction. (Almost) everything was good. A Definite watch if you haven't already.

I'll be honest, i didn't actually want to see this movie. The strongest reason being presence of Kangana Ranaut and Emraan Hashmi. If i could, i would throw these out of bollywood right now and forbid everyone to do any movie with them. I think they are among some of the worst actors we have here. But still, i was too intrigued by the Haji Mastaan parallels and wanted to see it. So reluctantly decided to watch it and promised to ignore the two (non)actors i just mentioned. And am i glad i did that or what?

The movie is set in the 70s (as already established earlier) and is pretty close to the underworld Don Haji Mastaan and to be (at that time) Don Dawood Ibrahim. Former makes the latter other only to be betrayed later. Its typical 70s cinema when the protagonist rises from the streets and is seen as a 'maseeha' in its locality. Too much information on the plot is neither relevant nor makes any difference.

The surprise package for me was Randeep hooda (who ironically is mentioned as a special appearance in the credits). To me, he was the pick of the lot. Yes, Even better than Ajay Devgan. May be because from Devgan you expect a certain standard while playing gangsta roles especially after company. Randeep had the most amazing dialogue delivery and i havent really heard such a deep voice in the younger actors since ages. His performance was exactly where it should be. Neither in the under acting nor in the hamming zone. Just at the line. Ajay (obviously) was amazing and actually adds to the dialogues through his delivery of content. Emraan Hashmi (to my surprise) was tolerable. (May be i liked the dialogues too much that i dint really bother about who was saying those :P). Kangana. . Prachi Desai dint have much to do anyways.

Another thing i (could have) liked was the background score had i not known the original tracks Pritam lifted it from. I was surprised how shamelessly the guy can pick up such popular soundtrack as Rock n Rolla and pass off as his own. I dont think he knows that the movie also released in the metros and there are people who follow hollywood. A couple of songs (original or otherwise) are hummable especially pee loon. Also, i dont think Pritam was able to give that retro feel that the narrative deserved.

Direction was crisp, although the first half seemed slightly longer. The movie dint actually move too much till the interval. I would have liked it more if the animosity between emraan and ajay should have been kept for some more time, given more time to cook and then the climax. Because of the stretched first half , the ending seemed abrupt and all too sudden.

Anyways, I hope a sequel is on the cards (PS: please dont keep emraan hashmi there)

Overall : A Definite watch to remind you of the 70s cinema

Feel-O-Meter: 8/10

PS: Do you think randeep portraying Emraan's role could have been taken it even further?? Just a thought :)